Well, I like 'em pretty well, for not dying, yet. On the left I think it's a moss rose; probably not long for this world, but it could still rally. On the right, well, if you can tell me what it is I'd be much obliged. I keep forgetting to ask. My dad dug them up from the yard and potted them for me to take home. "Oh, daddums," I said, "That seems ever such a cruel fate for two such innocent plants." I was haunted by the demise, all untimely, of two little fish some years back. But he insisted. So I put it by the balcony door, opened the shade a bit for some light, watered it every couple of days. When I went home again mom gifted me with her plant light. Perhaps they'll be a little healthier. I have the lamp on a timer so they get six hours of pseudo-sun a day. Does that sound about right? Also, would a grow light kill a vampire? Things I need to know.
Contest: name the plants! If your name is chosen, I will give you a stale LeeAnn Chin fortune cookie.
The one on the left is not long for this world, so don't name him until he starts looking better.
ReplyDeleteThe one on the right totally looks like a Roger to me.
Roger.
Totally.
you should throw that crap away.
ReplyDeleteI know, right? But no, I will let them die a natural death.
ReplyDeleteDon't condem Stacy and Roger just yet! (yes, Stacy) Keep the faith, hold the line, give those crazy plants a chance! I haven't seen a DNR on file for them. You can do it SD!!! If you listen, you can hear them crying "Save us". Godspeed.
ReplyDeleteBe with them. Can't you see they need you?
ReplyDeleteLooks like Stacy and Roger are headed for a nasty split! Perhaps we should rename them Nick and Jessica?
ReplyDeleteNo, just throw them away. They could linger for centuries...
ReplyDeleteStop hating on my plants, David! You just like cactus. I will split them up, when I get another pot. The moss rose is the girl plant, right? Stacy/Jessica shows signs of rallying today, probably because I haven't watered recently.
ReplyDeleteDoordolt, I knew you'd come through on the ID. Thanks for the info.
David,
ReplyDeleteDon't you read the tabloids? It's clearly over. It's been over for ages despite all their comments to the contrary. Yes, we are all sad but we will perservere. Now start accepting it so you can move on. Oh wait........you're talking about the plants aren't you? I see. So sorry. I assume that like me, everyone is mourning the loss of MTVs super couple and all their glorious gorgeousness.
I say if a plant doesn't have needles, it's probably a wussy and won't help you in a fight. I'm just saying.
ReplyDeleteLucas: I'm waiting for Nick and Tom to get together myself. It would be, like, a celebrity apocalypse. Tom's probably too smart for him, though.
ReplyDeleteBut I don't get all this tough talk from our usually cuddly Oppegaard. He wasn't like that back when I knew him as just a boy. But this atmosphere of negativity he's making is really harshing my scene. I don't think you can expect plants to thrive with those kind of vibes around.
You know, Kelly, SD, and all, if Nick had spikes and could go thrity days without water, he'd probably still be with Mrs. proactive Queen right now.
ReplyDeleteNick & Tom would be really cute together.
ReplyDeleteI don't need a plant to help me in a fight! I have my ninja skills.
Do I have to buy them a CD? Isn't it enough that I tell them dirty jokes?
At the end of the day, I still say you chuck that plant. Chuck it as far as the eye can see, and then run the other way.
ReplyDeleteAre these plants or semi-solid puddles?
ReplyDeleteWhat do they smell like and I'll tell you.
I'm scared to smell them. Ok, I'm going in.
ReplyDeleteThey smell like nothing, all I could smell was the fine Red River Valley soil they live in. Also, a touch of the pine scented incense I lit last night.
(wouldn't it be cool if we got up to 20 comments on this post? I believe it would be a first for Jerry)
David please remove your cranky pants which you have clearly been wearing for several days (Snow is toxic - you ass!) Then tell me what I can do to help elevate your mood? Perhaps 8 or 9 bourbons? Or maybe just a hug?
ReplyDeleteSD, Nick and Tom together is an interesting idea but I think Tom needs someone much more maleable in order to lay the Scientology mind meld on them. Nick seems to be a regular guy who will try to do something himself before hiring someone to do it for him, unlike his high maintenance, pampered, spoiled, mentally retarded, soon to be ex-wife who is the devil in high heeled boots.
So, how are the plants today?
And that's 20 for Jerry! And the people rejoiced.
I, uh, oh wait, wrong thread.
ReplyDeleteWow, I have a new appreciation for Nick, Lucas! And to you & Kelly: I know, David hates snow and plants and all that is good. He's in the nasty Kafka critter zone.
ReplyDeleteThe plants are ok today. I bought another pot, I think I'll move Jessica to it. She's in worse shape than Nick, so she may not be able to take the shock, but she needs better drainage. I think. And I got plant food too! I thought about buying N & J special dirt but there were too many kinds to choose from.
Nick and Jessica have officially split up. Jessica moved into her own digs, not sure how she will handle the stress.
ReplyDelete