I would really like to be at home right now.

I work in customer service. The following paragraph only applies to about 1% of customers.

If you have had 15 trouble calls and your picture isn't completely perfect, or your phone still has static, perhaps it's time to stop threatening to go to a different provider and just do it. Clearly it's not working out, and it's time to cut your losses. If you call us 7 times a day for a week straight, for any reason, and/or you think we have it in for you personally, you might be crazy, or at least an asshole. I mean, I do hate you, but it's transitory, fleeting. After we hang up I forget all my former enmity. Nobody here cares enough to spend time and effort messing your shit up, am I right? And I don't hate all customers. But this guy I'm talking to right now, he's a drag on society and needs to be eliminated.

Is contempt for all humanity a good enough reason to go home sick? An argument could be made.

Hey'all what up? I should be working but it is a project that never ends and i get to take my time so i am going to post on here and on my other blog too! WOO HOO!
Harry Potter?! C'mon you guys! Seriously why take the time and money? But to each their own i guess. Y'all go see that and i will be next door seeing Rent again!
Hope y'all are doin well! And remember tomorrow is iambic pentameter wednesday!
Peace out kids

Hey, who's got Asperger's?

Guess what? I'm not autistic, not quite autistic! Yay! Although it would be nice to be better at math. (Please don't be offended if you or someone you know is affected by these disorders.) I was looking at a blog on Sunday that I can't find now. This guy took the DSM diagnosis info for Asperger's syndrome and compared himself with it. Some of the traits remind me of me, especially when I was a bit younger; some of them remind me of people I know -- and you know who you are! Don't even lie. Anyway, I was looking for the guy's blog and found the following OkCupid Test, which was found originally on Wired.com but it's broken. And I couldn't get the html from OkCupid to work either. feh

I got a 30, if you are curious, which is higher than 70% of people my age and gender, but still sub-clinical. And isn't that what Christmas is all about?

I love these plants.

Well, I like 'em pretty well, for not dying, yet. On the left I think it's a moss rose; probably not long for this world, but it could still rally. On the right, well, if you can tell me what it is I'd be much obliged. I keep forgetting to ask. My dad dug them up from the yard and potted them for me to take home. "Oh, daddums," I said, "That seems ever such a cruel fate for two such innocent plants." I was haunted by the demise, all untimely, of two little fish some years back. But he insisted. So I put it by the balcony door, opened the shade a bit for some light, watered it every couple of days. When I went home again mom gifted me with her plant light. Perhaps they'll be a little healthier. I have the lamp on a timer so they get six hours of pseudo-sun a day. Does that sound about right? Also, would a grow light kill a vampire? Things I need to know.

Contest: name the plants! If your name is chosen, I will give you a stale LeeAnn Chin fortune cookie.

I can't think of anything I have to do,

but I feel like there's something I'm forgetting.

I think I will set up my Christmas tree today, maybe tomorrow. It's really winter now, people, maybe not based on the position of the northern hemisphere in relation to the sun or whatever hoodoo, but I had to scrape frost off my car windows this morning, and that's friggin winter.

Right now I am curled up in two blankets (Johnson, I borrowed your blanket!), as cozy as I can be in a desk chair.

Thanksgiving Aftermath

Ok, green bean casserole is not actually that great. And did you know that Campbell's Cream of Mushroom soup and French's Onions offer different recipes on their labels? We settled for the Campbell's version, but added the soy sauce suggested by the fine people at French's.

My nephew was there, didn't think he would be. I tried to get a picture, but he was too fast for me. The little girls rifled through my purse, interrupted my nap, and tried to give me another makeover, but I dodged 'em. Everybody was in a pretty good mood. Two of three brothers were there. It didn't start snowing until after I got back to Cloud. A reasonably satisfactory holiday.

Also, I went from this blog to this one to this, a handy, inspiring countdown to the end of Bush's second term. My favorite line from their Top Ten Reasons to Purchase a BackwardsBush Keychain: Carrying a BackwardsBush keychain will make it much easier on the Secret Service to identify you when they break into your house in the middle of the night to take you to Guantanamo.

Buy Nothing Day & Thanksgiving Niceness

Heard of this? Just don't buy anything on that crazy hyped up Black Friday of Retail! Brought to you by the fine people at Adbusters. Here's a Motley Fool article that takes the concept beyond anti-corporate, anti-materialism protest, and goes into the more persuasive realm of self interest. Cancel Christmas. Well, not totally.

I am thankful, this Thanksgiving, that there is so much worthless shit available to buy, and further thankful that I am not going to buy it. Probably.

I am making green bean casserole for Thanksgiving with my family. When it involves fewer than five ingredients and no skill, I am a super cook. And my nieces will be there, which is very nice. We only get them every other holiday. The nephew will be with his other dad. Bummer. When he was about 3 1/2 he left me the nicest answering machine message I ever got. I could hear my mom coaching him in the background. "Hi, Bamie. I wuv oo Bamie. Byeeee." That's all for now, everybody have a happy Thanksgiving, and shop or not, as you prefer.

Football fans

Hey, did you know there are a lot of Green Bay fans in California?

types of nerds. holidays

Yesterday, some people derided me for being a "literary nerd". That just means I like to read. These persons are "regular nerds", or computer/tech geeks and also cable nerds. They look down on me, because they have marketable skills and I just have some books. I told them I am going to start identifying and celebrating obscure literary holidays (birthdays? publication dates?), with appropriate beverages, and maybe activities. And you're not invited!

Jane Austen: white soup, negus, Madeira wine, tea. I don't know what the first two are, but we'll make do.
Bloomsday: Guinness, I guess. There's maybe something better.
Dorothy Parker: "I love a martini -- but two at the most. Three I’m under the table; Four, I’m under the host.”
Robert Burn: Scotchy, scotch scotch. And gie her a haggis. But I'm not having any haggis.

Any ideas for other writers? Or nerd holidays of any decription. Ever heard of Mole Day?

Posting rules & etiquette

Voix has another excellent post, blogging about blogging, basically. A great companion piece to this. Blogagaard also ponders blogging, and there seems to be some sort of assemblage of these types tomorrow, in Minneapolis. Be warned! Be alert! Be prepared!

I don't really have anything to blog about blogging, it's just fun. Also, today I bought some candles and some pants.

Super Dirty!

I can't even describe it.
http://srmcclurg.blogspot.com/

Blogger Happy Hour Fun Times?

From la Michèle: "A gang of us will be at Psycho Suzi's Motor Lounge on Saturday evening after the Lit 6 Project show. I'm guessing we should be over there by 7:30ish. What do you guys think?"

I know I can't make it, but y'all have fun. Hey, if anyone is in central Minnesota, come to Legends bar in the Holiday Inn. It's at the intersection of highways 15 and 23, you betcha. Saturday night, after 8 pm. It's actually CN's mom's shindig, but whatever. Her mom is awesome.

James Joyce

It's time for another installment of "writers I like pretty good", an irregular feature on JTT. Quite a switch, from online advice columnists. But here it is, from Araby, in Dubliners: "Gazing up into the darkness, I saw myself as a creature driven and deried by vanity; and my eyes burned with anguish and anger."

Another dream

In the dream I had to take a test; there was a list of names and clues to match up. It was really inane, like one clue had the word Ritz in it, and it was referring to someone with the last name "Cracker". I couldn't do two of questions, I turned it in with those spaces blank. My former supervisor was giving the test. She rolled her eyes at me when I handed it in. We all left to get in our cars and go home. Some of us had to park down the street, I had to pay $20 to park there, so did my old boss, but her car was missing from the lot. Mine was there but at first I walked too far down the street and had to turn back. That's pretty much the whole dream, as far as I can remember.

I had a similar dream a few weeks ago, that time I was in a spelling bee, but in the final round, we had to memorize something and recite it to the audience. But then that wasn't what we were really supposed to do, and I couldn't find anything I liked, or memorize anything anyway.

I've never had the 'oh, no, I didn't study for this test!' dream, but these seem to be of the same theme. Borrring! It's so boring! Stop boring me, dreams! And everybody else is bored too!

No subject

It's dark outside. I noticed it was starting to get dark at 4:45. I super hate that a lot. I woke up this morning, not all that early, and the sun was not out, and I said "fuck it" and went back to sleep. Eventually I did get out of bed, and I went for breakfast with Crapnasty and Rainbow Flyer before they headed down to the Cities for shopping and the concert tonight. Those crazy kids with their hippity-hop music.

Define yourself.

Or let these quizzes do it for you. They appear to be based on no particular authority, but I'm sure they wouldn't be on the internet if they weren't highly accurate.

I am a nerd! Are you a nerd, a dork, a geek or a regular Joe?

I am a robot! What's your personality defect?

I'm Myrna Loy!
Which classic movie dame are you?

Do not get in his way

For he is a bad, bad man!




Oh, sure. He looks all friendly, and surprised, too. It's the body language, though, to which you must play particular attention.

Oneiric

oneiric \oh-NY-rik\, adjective: Of, pertaining to, or suggestive of dreams; dreamy.

This is a good word for today. It took me a while to wake up this morning. I had dreams about normal everyday stuff, which is confusing. I was half awake, thinking I should really look at my clock to see how much longer I could sleep. Then I slipped into a dream where I was looking at the alarm clock on the bedside table, but I was standing up, not lying in bed, and the clock was changing from 8:38 to 9:39 and back again. I woke for real a few minutes later, it was much later than I thought it was in the dream. It reminded me of when I lost my watch a few years ago; I had a recurring dream of finding my watch. I would wake up thinking I had it, but no. Stupid dream, right? I thought for a while it meant Something Deep and Significant, but now I think not so much. I just needed to get a new watch or get out of the habit of wearing one. So I don't wear a watch anymore.

What is the stupidest dream you have had?

Weird but I kind of like it.

Catlebrity

So, how was everybody's weekend?

Um. How was my weekend, while you're at it? Ha, ha. Just kidding. But seriously folks, a few questions:
Does anyone else remember crapnasty telling me she was going to bite me? And me responding, "I will punch you right in the face!" But we were being funny about it. And why was she going to bite me?

Did I really say, "I hate my socks!"? That seems like the kind of overstatement I would make, but I was quite fond of those socks until I walked around Pesty's in them, and then outside, and into aoasus's house. Thanks for the socks, by the way. You will never see them again. They are incredibly comfortable.

Where did I get the cigars? There were two left in the box I found in my purse. I think I was found 'em at aoasus's house, and he said they were his roommate's & I should take them. But maybe I just stole them. But why? And does anyone want them?

Does anyone remember me lying under the coffee table, or was that a dream I had later?

Next time, could you guys remind me that I am the type of person who should not mix the two substances I mixed on Friday night? It would be ever so lovely if you would. I was sick for 12 hours. I felt like I'd been poisoned.

Can you believe crapnasty? I was shocked, shocked! But then I am a tremendous hypocrite. Also, she told me of some craziness, that I don't think any of us saw! She is fun.

Doordolt, we can't remember if we saw you, uh, how to say?, mix the substances? Thanks for the ride, glad I didn't puke in your car.


Marvin freak: Did you have fun? You were pretty quiet. No spankings at all!

RF: we danced a lot! wowza. How did you feel the next day? How much fun are we going to have on Saturday? Answer: a lot of fun!!! Did you see the pic Tiff took of us?

What time did the birthday girl leave? Did you guys meet her daughters? Did the waitstaff really confiscate the make-Jen-drink cowbells?

Ok, I expect answers to all of these questions, people.

Sorry, no livestock pictures. Just a boring post about books.

I'm going into my annual bookthing, reading the books I reread every year. I had a start in August, but quit. There was a stretch there where I didn't have a book going at all, just read magazines and blogs and junk. I am doing the scary book thing right now.

Next, Dubliners. This time I should read it in small doses; it is very melancholy. Then I'll try Portrait again, haven't gotten through it yet. I'll take a break, cleanse my palate with a few back issues of the National Enquirer when I go home for Thanksgiving.

I should get through the rest of the list (Austen, the Brontes, Forster) by the Superbowl, if I really want to and I don't end up going out to the bars three nights a week. But that sounds pretty good too.

Villains! Blackguards! Persons of ill repute!

I am excessively indignant today. Someone stole my spinach dip from the fridge at work! I am indignant! I made a little sign and put it on the fridge!

I've rarely been a victim of the office lunch-napper. Once or twice a soda has gone missing, never to be heard from again. It's just dip, and worse things have happened. But I'm sure I've read somewhere, somewhere, that it is a pathological and sick thing to do.

Our thief or thieves are just too lazy and cheap to get their own food. Or maybe they enjoy the transgressive nature of the act. Or maybe I brought the dip home last night, and forgot. That would be awesome!

Halloween is gone and dead

I'm leaving the decor on top of my computer monitor at work a little while longer. The cute little mini-gravestones remind one that life is finite and should not be wasted on work.



This isn't what my display looks like, but very close. Shut up. It does so.

Opposing repression, orthodoxy, and collectivism!

J. Johnson pointed me to this site. She found it while she was doing research for one of her classes.
http://www.promethea.org/
Umm. I'm scared they're going to come and get me if I make fun of them. So, you guys mock them in the comments and we'll see what happens. It's a little libertarian, a little anarcho-capitalism, a dash of Objectivism, with a side order of eugenics!
So, you ask, what is Prometheanism? I still don't know. But here's a start. Psych! Not so much. But it gives you a taste.

Prometheanism is the philosophy that inspired the foundation of the Promethean movement. It is especially concerned with inspiring and guiding the actions of those within the movement, especially Prometheans, the leaders of the movement, who have the task of exploring, developing, and clarifying Prometheanism for themselves and others. Prometheanism as a philosophy certainly has something to contribute to the lives of everyone, however, not only those who are involved with the Promethean movement.