On the phone

Yesterday at work I answered the phone, as I do a hundred times a day, and said my customary greeting. In return I heard a tiny voice saying, "My mom... [indecipherable] bug in her hair [not speaking into the phone's reciever] and isn't here... gotta get that bug out of her hair."

I thought instead of slamming down the phone I would try to help, so I said in my sweetest, fakest voice, "What's your mom's name?"

Wrong question. "Um [babbling]. Jessica? {yelling} Mom? What's your name?"

Mom gets on the phone. "Hello?"

"Hi," I said. "You guys called us?"

Mom says, "Uh, I don't know. Sorry, bye." as the little girl in the background says, "Mom, I don't know your name..."

That was the end of the call. And they were never heard from again. I don't know if the mom's name actually was Jessica, or the moppet just really liked that name. These are the harrowing mysteries I must confront each day.