Action: Remember to blog

Have you ever told yourself to remember something, then you remember only that you were going to remember something but not what it was that you were supposed to remember? So, your plan to remember worked except for the small idea of content.

But then I remembered what I was supposed to remember, and I don't care. Borrrring.

Messy is good

“Order can be profane and life-diminishing,” he said the other day....

So true.

Everybody have a lovely christmas weekend and whatnot

Ok, then.

Oh, my.

Who stole Jesus' foreskin?

Was it you?

Xmas shopping

I have 3 brothers who are very different from each other, yet I got them all the same thing. No, it was not socks, plaid shirts, or candy. Although candy might've been better. But no, I'm sticking with this. Spoiler alert: if you are my brother (and who isn't?) and you don't want to know what your present is, stop reading here. Ok, here it is: thumb drives. Yep, 256k of sweet, sweet storage. I figure it was a slightly more exciting gift than compact fluorescent lightbulbs. Not too much more exciting, I don't want them getting the vapors or anything.

I went to the mall to do this shopping. It wasn't so bad. I was chatting with this guy at work, he didn't like the way Christmas is so commercial "these days". You know, the commercialization of Christmas doesn't bother me. I can't control if other people decide to drive themselves nuts, or spoil their overprivileged brats, or feel the need to outspend their neighbors on useless crap. Let's not worry about every body else, shall we? Let's be chill.

Casu consulto

"Accidentally on purpose". Does that mean mere sneakiness, general guile, or something else? Like, fate converging on you, or a bunch of coincidences that bring you to something?

I don't know, I just heard that phrase and I wanted to use it. Then I looked it up and found this:

Good joke: Essential Latin Phrases

Contains the essential "Quantum materiae materietur marmota monax si marmota monax materiam possit materiari?"

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

At work my boss talks about how we should always underpromise and overdeliver, and is it a sign of my attitude problem that it reminds me of this: Aim Low, Reach Your Goals, Avoid Disappointment?

Good joke: Inspirational Posters For The Cubicle Era

I woke up at 3:30

And I can't get back to sleep. So I've been reading Gawker, especially this post, and stuff like that.

This is the sound of an annoyed platypus (is there any other kind?).

the party was pretty good

Deuces Wild yelled at my pregnant co-worker for not drinking. Well, that's an exageration; they started to chastise her then she pointed to her tummy. And she got some ice water for the many "Team drink! Team drink!" things that they did. I shall now exagerate everything about the party. And lie. There was a stack of shrimp six stories high, encircled by a moat of cocktail sauce. Someone accidentally gave me extra drink tickets, and I returned them, because I'm a stooge like that; then I changed my mind and stole the whole roll of tickets and ran shrieking through the room, tossing tickets to lucky children as I fled. There was a conga line. I'm running out of steam for this description.

Santa baby

We're doing the secret santa thing at work. Somebody stole jb's present. Isn't that terribly un-christmassy? As a result, jb was mildly apoplectic for part of the day. It's a three day thing, so she got something yesterday and she'll probably get something tomorrow, so she'll feel better then. Also, we went for lunch at a good place with many breadsticks, which also helped make her feel better or put her in a carbo-coma, which is good too.

So far I've gotten some stuff from my Secret Santa too: bubble bath, loofah, notepad with santa on it, dark chocolate. I got my santa person a mini christmas tree and lights. Tomorrow I'm giving him a Charlie Brown Christmas CD. I think that is awesome, I hope whatsisface likes it.

Tomorrow night is the work Christmas party. It's one of those things that are obviously supposed to be fun, that is the point, right? I think the odds are good (51% likelihood) that it will be but I am usually cautious of such events. An work party is potentially a fricking minefield, you know it is.

Happy holidays

I'm just not feeling it this year. Luckily I have a few events to help me get in the spirit. I'm not grinchy, I'm not anti-christmas, or anything like that, I just feel detached from the festivities. My cousin is getting married on December 23rd, so that is really cool. I guess he knocked up his girlfriend. So, party with the fam! Having a wedding in Fargo the weekend before Christmas is a bit dicey, but the weather reports look good so far.

Beep update

No beeping this morning. I think it's a test.

Beep beep beep-beep

I woke up to the sound of many beeps this morning. Usually there are a few. The beeps sound just like my alarm clock, except louder and from much farther away, and I hate them. I think it might be a garbage truck backing up, lots of times. Because the garbage collectors hate me; I'm sure they think I don't recycle enough. This morning, the beeps were more insistent and accusatory than usual. I even rolled over to check to make sure it wasn't my alarm clock. But no, it was too early for that yet. So I endured the beeping by burrowing under the pillows until the alarm clock piped up to join it's beeping brothers outside. Half asleep, I had a theory that something about the weather made the beeping more, hmm, prolific than the usual Tuesday.

Noooooo, the beeping wasn't in my head. It was garbage trucks. Or maybe some trucks from one of the businesses nearby. I'm almost sure of it.

Cute or creepy: you decide!

CUTE THINGS FALLING ASLEEP

It made me yawn, but in a good way.

Hockey and italian food

I like hockey. I like pasta. So last night was great. I had more to say, but eh. Fucking computer. Although... if you spend twenty minutes writing something, it gets lost, and you don't think the lost stuff is worth rewriting, is that a sign that it was crappy, that you are lazy or both? Yeah, both.

It seems like everything I want to do is scheduled at the same time. Any Saturday that there is one thing I want to do, or go to, there are also one or two more. Witness my stellar non-attendance at Lit6 shows. Oh well, what are ya gonna do?

The next post will be on Blogger Beta,

it's the end of an era or something.

Just wanted to let ya'll know in case it gets all jacked up.

Something I learned from listening to NPR today

-Some conservatives think that the US has been using 'diplomacy' in Iraq, and that is why things are going so poorly. What we need is about 50,000 more troops over there, then everything will be all better.

Well, that solves that! Awesome.

I got a haircut!

This isn't really exciting news, but I did indeed get a haircut this evening. Basically, my co-worker said she was going to get her hair cut. I said, I should really do that sometime. She said, Come with me. I said, Nah... Ok.

So I did. I also got my eyebrows waxed. So did she. I always forgets how much that hurts like a motherfucker.

I usually don't like chatting with the hairstylist. This time too. I never have anything to say. I figure they might appreciate a little silence as much as I do.

The stylist's name was Misty Rae. No kidding. I saw it on her cosmetology license there on the wall.

Hey there, Monday.

How you doin'?

Did anyone check out the new St. Cloud Hooters on its opening night? Are the reviews in from the restaurant critics?

Odd Book Titles

From here.

• People Who Don't Know They Are Dead: How They Attach Themselves to Unsuspecting Bystanders and what to Do About It
• Bombproof Your Horse
• The Big Book of Lesbian Horse Stories
• Living With Crazy Buttocks
• The Joy of Sex: Pocket Edition
• Reusing Old Graves
• American Bottom Archaeology
• How to Avoid Huge Ships
• Lesbian Sadomasochism Safety Manual
• Versailles: The View from Sweden
• Oral Sadism and the Vegetarian Personality
• The Book of Marmalade: Its Antecedents, Its History and Its Role in the World Today
• Population and Other Problems
• Last Chance at Love - Terminal Romances
• Proceedings of the 2nd International Workshop of Nude Mice

Movies I might watch today

Elf
Love Actually
The Shop Around the Corner
Hotel Berlin
The Producers
Guys and Dolls
I Love You Again
Singin' in the Rain
The Others
The Mortal Storm
Stage Door

The list prompts the question: Who really gives a shit? I don't. I couldn't even tell you why I am posting this. Does it express anything? If you were wondering what I was up to today, this is it.